This year is not at all what I expected. I have finished student teaching and my Masters Degree, been a bum for a summer, and taught 1st grade for 5 months. I never thought I would finish the Masters program. I cried and cried when I first started, thinking I could not do it. As the year went on, and I fell in love with teaching all over again, I realized (with the help of my husband, family and friends) I can do anything for a year.
This summer stunk. Well, for me it did. For my brother and sister-in-law, it was a miracle-they adopted a baby girl in July, who I got to meet for the first time last week! For my friend, she added a fourth child to her family at the end of July. I had the opportunity to watch her kids the night before and see her newborn and hold him in the hospital. For me, personally, I looked for jobs. I slept in a lot, I cried a lot, and I looked for more jobs. I did toy with the idea of starting a jewelry making business, and started a jewelry blog that [surprise] I have not updated since the summer.
In August, I was offered a first grade interim position (the last blog I wrote explains it more thoroughly). I was ecstatic! I have enjoyed working with the first grade teachers at my school and getting to know my students. I did not expect any of what has happened in the past five months. Sam says I should write a book about it-1st graders come with great stories, and maybe I'll share them on here at a later time.
I've learned that in order to teach, you first have to love. There is no way I can teach these students what a noun or verb is, if I don't first teach them that I love them and that they are safe at school. Without love, nothing else matters. There is no need for anything else, if you don't have love. I also learned (once again, with thanks to my husband) that I am only here to plant seeds. I do not get to see them grow completely. I have heard this before, but the note my husband left me one morning hit HARD. God takes the seeds we plant and continues to take care of them as they grow. I have no idea why the teacher I interimed (yes, I made up that word) for decided not to retire, but I know that I was placed there, for that time and now it is time for me to let go.
Please don't let me fool you, I did not come to this reality easily. And I have a feeling it will be something I have to learn over and over and over and over...
Now, as we begin another year, I have another opportunity. I am the interim teacher for a third grade classroom. I will be there for the remainder of the year (as far as I know). I am looking forward to this opportunity with confidence, and a lot of fear. I know those seem to be conflicting emotions, but that is exactly how I feel. I have new students to meet, new curriculum to teach, and a wonderful group of teachers to work with. I also have the first 6 weeks planned out for me from the previous teacher, and this was the same time I soloed in third grade last year during my student teaching.
I hope to share more and have great stories from third grade to tell. I will be more diligent at keeping you up to date (I know you are sitting on the edge of your seats!)
